Posted by Dr.Bob on September 08, 2001 at 23:45:01:
In Reply to: Re: My 17 year old is driving us NUTS! posted by Deb on March 14, 2001 at 10:26:21:
: : My son used to be a good student, easy going, and amiable. About his 15th year, he began to change and now he's 17. He doesn't care about his grades anymore. He used to have a 3.7 gpa and now he will be lucky if he graduates high school at all. Our dreams for college have gone out the window. He is so unmotivated. His attitude is horrible and he even smokes pot now. Tried to get him some counseling which helped a little but he's still not motivated to do anything and still smokes pot with his friends. We have tried to remain somewhat optimistic and not give him negative messages about himself but it is hard when we're so disappointed. We had such high hopes. He will be out of school this June and IF he graduates I would like to kick his butt out of the house. Maybe he needs to learn it like I did - the hard way. What is your opnion on this? Is it wrong for me to insist he straighten up get the h-- out? Can I get some opinions on making your kids leave home? I don't want to do it but he creates such disharmony in the household. Will he grow out of it? Should I wait a couple of years and see what happens?
: My son in 19. We have had the same kinds of problems. My son ended up having a DUI. He has not been able to drive for the last 6 mos. This is what can happen to your son too. Mine is graduating this spring and is having a lot of anxiety. He is now on Paxil. I think the kids have a lot more pressure on them than we can imagine. I'd say to just put your foot down, make some rules, make some consequences and stick to them to a "T" The bottom line being...if you screw up, you will have to leave. Then pack his stuff in trash bags and set it outside the door. I know it sounds hard to do, but being tough about it may wake him up. My son knows that he will have to leave if we have another problem with him...we have 3 other children to be concerned about. You can not let your son become an example to your other children, make an example OUT of him!